If you’re already married like me, you’d say “we’ve all been there”, if you’re still single, well it might be lingering on your mind right now.
Mr. Right / Ms. Perfect
Future Hubby / Future Wifey
Number of Kids
Or we can just summarize it in one big word – FUTURE
When I was single – no boyfriend, I had a clear view of my future. I had my goals, and I only focused on them. Dating or finding Mr. Right or Hubby wasn’t in my future – well so I thought. But life can be frustrating sometimes because it has ways of turning things around. I fell in love, dated, graduated from college, got engaged, and now married. Seems like a pattern you would want your future to be, right? I don’t blame you, because every time I think about how my life turned out, it brings so much joy in me.
But then sometimes, we can get caught up thinking about the future that we often forget to enjoy or even pay attention to the present. So, I came up with 10 pre-marital bucket list. These are the things I’ve done and wished to do before getting married.
10 PRE-MARITAL BUCKET LIST
1. Get a job (if you don’t have any). I know you can still look and get a job after you get married, but if you were a girl like me – excited about having kids – getting a job at this stage would not be a great idea. First, what’s going to happen if you get a job and on your first week, you found out you’re pregnant? Second, if you were like me again, you would want to be with your kids from the day they were born to at least about the age when they start going to school. Of course, if you’re a man having a job before getting married is a norm. It is self-explanatory.
2. Travel. Either you travel alone or with your friends or better yet your future hubby/wifey, because it’s easier to travel before you get married. First is the obvious, you get to see other places and experience other culture, and the best part of it is meeting other people – who knows maybe in that strange place you’ll meet Mr. Right/ Ms. Perfect. Second, you don’t need to worry about responsibilities. I’ve travelled before I get married, and it was easier, because I don’t need to worry about my financial responsibilities. Once I get married, my priorities have changed. I or we can’t just pack our luggage and go, because we have bills to pay, job to keep, and many more responsibilities that you probably don’t have before you get married.
3. Suffer a major heart break. I don’t mean take your heart out and hammer it, what I mean is don’t be afraid to fall in love hard and get hurt. Nobody wants to get hurt, but this way you’ll learn never to take love for granted.
4. Focus on your education. If you’re still in school, I suggest that you focus on getting your degree(s) first. I am not saying you cannot do this after you get married, but as someone says “love can wait,” and it’s true.
5. Learn how to manage your own finances. This is very crucial, in my opinion. If you’re like me who never worry about anything while in college, learning to manage your own finances would be really difficult. Once you get married, you’ll realize that the things you want are different from the things you need.
6. Talk to your future spouse about money. I am not suggesting that you go ahead and ask him how much your future spouse makes – that’s a big NO NO. What I am suggesting is to find out how he/she values his/her hard-earned income. It is better to know earlier if your spouse is the kind of person who just throw money on things he/she don’t need. Also, it will be great to know what your spouse thinks about money saving.
7. Make an Investment. This is not only additional “wife-material-points or pogi-points (for men),” but it will also give you so much comfort that when there’s an emergency and your savings account is empty, you still have your security blanket – investments.
8. Have a big fight with your future spouse. Probably one of the things you or we are trying to avoid in relationships, but hey, you also need to know the angry side of your future partner. You wouldn’t want to be surprise later on that your spouse is the type of person who throws and breaks stuff when angry. Then make up after the fight. It will be good to know that you can get through a fight.
9. Talk about kids with your spouse. If you’re a girl and not yet engaged to your future husband or your boyfriend is not open to have this conversation, I suggest not to bring this up yet- because it might scare him away. It’s always good to know your partner’s expectations from you. There are some men who don’t like to have kids and some do – and so as women. It will be better to talk about it sooner than later, and find out if you were on the same page with your partner.
10. LOVE YOURSELF. This is the most important thing on this bucket list, and it’s pretty much self-explanatory.
I hope you guys enjoy reading this post and find it helpful. If you have anything you want to add to this list please leave it in the comment below so everyone can see it. See you on my next post!